Sport jokes
What is better than a paralympic gold medal?
Walking! 😂😂😂
He's got a massive f*cking cock, Ayew, Ayew. He tucks it in his football sock, Ayew, Ayew. Shagged a bird and now she's dead, Swung his cock around her head, Jordan Ayew Palace number nine.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home plate is.
What's the difference between soccer and a dead baby?
I don't wear steel cap boots when I play soccer.
I was born and raised in Newcastle.
My grandfather used to tell me stories about Penaldo, a goblin from Portugal that travels to England when Newcastle is playing. He scores a tapin and then disappears until the next Newcastle game. I still have nightmares that he’s in our stadium.
Why does the basketball never get a date?
Because they dribble.
Why couldn't the orphan play baseball?
He couldn't find home.
What do you call an injured person who doesn't want to play a game with you? A sore loser.
Why do orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home plate.
Why did Rolf Harris meet underage kids?
To tie his kangaroo down, sport!
Q: What do you call deaf Magic Johnson?
A: Hearing Aids.
What's the difference between a newborn baby and an orphan after a rugby match?
They both come out bloody and crying, but at least one gets picked up.
I like my women how I like my golf score: low in the 80s and with a handicap.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
Why can’t orphans play baseball? Because they can’t find the first base they came from.
What do you call a farting boxer?
Gaseous Clay.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they don’t know what a home looks like.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't run home.
Why can Chinese people play baseball? Because they ate the bat.
If you take a shot, a paper wad, in the trashcan, and call "Kobe!" but miss, it's still a Kobe.