Sport jokes
What's Africa's greatest sporting achievement? The 2018 World Cup...
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home.
There was a recent football match between Ethiopia and Egypt.
Egypt 8, Ethiopia 0.
I love to play catch with my dad! He's never there to catch the ball, though.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
They don't have a home plate.
Kobe missed a lot of shots, but he sure didn’t miss the mountain.
What is Jesus' favorite sport? CrossFit.
Why can Chinese people play baseball?
Because they ate the bat.
Why is a pro fighter like a fisher?
They both can throw a hook.
Why did the football player go to the bank?
To get his quarter back.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find a way home.
Random kid: Yo mama so stupid that she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.
Orphan: What's a mama?
Random kid: *shook*
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team's bench.
After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. "Oh, I really liked it," she replied, "especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents."
Dumbfounded, her date asked, "What do you mean?"
"Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it, and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, 'Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!' I'm like, hello? It's only 25 cents!"
"Sweet victory" fans: Fuck the NFL. They should be disbanded!
Harvey Weinstein: I raped five girls, and the NFL was one of them.
What has 3 legs, 4 arms, and 5 heads?
The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
Why do orphans play tennis? Because that's the only thing they love.
One day I was very happy. I managed to win the lottery and receive a free vacation trip to Saudi Arabia!
Everything was going well until suddenly the FRAUD appeared! It was him, PRISTIANO PENALDO! He dived toward me and grabbed my lottery ticket. I asked him why he is doing this, only for him to reply "I need trip to Saudi Arabia to statpad the PENS!" as he dived back through my window.
Shame on you for stealing my vacation and ruining my day! You are no longer my Idol Pristianooooo!
What has 6 legs, 10 arms, and 3 heads?
The Boston marathon finish line.
Why can't Jesus play hockey?
He keeps getting nailed to the boards.
Your clown is so stupid it took a spoon to the Super Bowl.