Sound jokes
Why was Sonic fast?
To be rolling around at the speed of sound, got places to go, gotta follow my lead.
What's a cat's favorite instrument? Purr-cussion.
What is a dog's favorite snack?
RUFFles.
How do rappers communicate underwater?
They drop some sick flow-tation.
What did the DJ say to the VEGETABLE?
"Lettuce turnip the beet!"
Why Jake?
FRRR N
Why does Megan sound like a man, but she is a good singer and rapper, but then people talk about her? What's y'all rapper are singer?
"Hump a vow, it makes a cow."
What song is the most annoying for a Serb?
Sweet Home Alabama (because it sounds like Sweet Home Albania)!
Watching paint dry sounds like a thrill compared to spending time with Slade.
Why did the DJ go to therapy?
Because he had too many issues with his TURNTABLE.
What happens to an Indian's doorbell when you ring it?
A ring-a-ding-a-ding.
Heh.
In light of Trump's slurring, staggering, and incoherence, I wondered if he should get checked for a brain tumor.
Then I realized how ridiculous that sounded.
A tumor can't grow in something that doesn't exist in the first place.
So I was in the car with my mom one time and we always joke about me being adopted (I am not), and Michael Jackson's song "Billie Jean" sounds like my name, and so my mom says, as the song is playing, "(My name) is not my daughter, she's just a girl who claims that I am her mum." Wow. *applauds for mother* Love you momma =)
What does having sex with a woman and cooking an egg in a skillet have in common?
Both end with a loud annoying sound and a gooey mess to clean the shit up.
What did the cat say when he fell off the table?
MEOM!
Tell someone to say "alpha" and then "kenny one". Tell them to say it very fast. Tell them it sounded like they said, "I'll fuck anyone!"
Dad: What do you call a crazy creeper?
Mom: Shit, I don't know...
Kid: Crrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
Dad: That's my boy's!!!
How do asses communicate?
Through booty calls!