Son jokes

Little Johnny’s father walks into the bathroom and catches him masturbating. He says, “Son, every time you do that, you kill an innocent baby.”

The next day, his father walks into the bathroom and catches him again. Johnny says, “Bow your head, Dad. Can’t you see we’re having a funeral?”

I saw a petition on replacing gravestones with trees so it will be a beautiful forest.

Son: Where's grandma?

The Man: "Sonny, why do you come to get some milk every day?"

The Son: "Because milk is important."

The Man: "Why don't you ever come with your mom?"

The Boy: "Who?"

The Man: "Your mom?"

The Boy: "I don't have a mom."

The Man: "I'm sorry for your loss."

The boy stared for a moment when two men came out of the vehicle and picked up the boy.

Dad: Hey, have you seen that new movie, "Constipation"?

Son: No.

Dad: It hasn't come out yet.

My dad: You better wear flip-flops everywhere.

Suicidal son: Goes to crack alley.

"Others, Morris, Sal, Sal, Rasuba Marid, Things!"

My son is broken: "I think at home!"

Happiness!

Son: Daddy, what's dark humor?

Dad: See that man over there with no arms or legs? Go tell him to stand up and clap.

Son: But Daddy, I'm blind.

Dad: Exactly.

My son.

Dad fucked Mom.

Mom fucked son.

Son fucked sister.

Sister fucked dog.

Dog fucked cat.

Cat fucked bird.

Bird fucked fish.

Fish fucked Dad.

Dad really liked it!

What do you call a communist?

Braxton.

I bought my fat wheelchair son a treadmill for his birthday, then that big brainless special motherfucker cried over it and threw a fit cuz his fat special ass couldn't get up out of his wheelchair and said for Jesus to raise him up and give him working and movable legs.

What do you call a son of Gilgamesh that hates flashy lights? The epileptic of Gilgamesh.

I got my son a bike for his birthday. The ungrateful fucker just sat in his wheelchair all day crying.

One day a son and his grandad were smoking.

Too bad only the sun was smoking. :)

My little brother is scared of ghosts so I won't let him watch Bayern today.

Okay, I may be strict, but I won't let Tapindowski give my son a heart attack. His shocking ghosting performance today is a danger to my family and I'll ask UEFA to investigate the matter.

"Mom, these balloons are hard to blow."

"Son, stay out of the drawer."

What did the mama nut say to her son?

“If I ever cashew doing that, I walnut be happy.”

A bee said to his naughty son, "Honey, stop bee-ing abnormal and bee positive!"

Hi, son.

Son: Dad, what are those two huge balloons on mommy's chest?

Dad: I don't see balloons, but I see boobs. I mean, yes, balloons.

Son: Are you sure they're balloons? Yesterday I heard Uncle Frank trying to get a milk dispenser working.