Society

Society jokes

Alien

Things said by racist aliens:

"Some of my best friends are Green."

"I just know that Orange guy stole my spaceship."

"You're very pretty for a Purple girl."

"We know you Tentacletians like to rape everyone with your tentacles!"

"Adax Hitao should have finished off you Bluish people."

"You 2-headed people are so stupid!"

"No Slimatians are allowed in this restaurant because of health codes."

"Get the hell out of my store you grigger!"

"The Plu Plux Plum meeting is tonight! Let's burn some spaceships on the Greenies' lawns!"

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  • Priest

    What happened to the eight-year-old boy that needed to go to the bathroom during church?

    The priest stopped him on the way there.

    Blowjob

    What is the difference between a gay male who is not physically challenged giving a blowjob to a gay male that is not physically challenged, and a gay male who is physically challenged giving a blowjob to a gay male who is not physically challenged?

    A gay male who is not physically challenged who receives a blowjob from a gay male who is physically challenged would still not believe that the physically challenged male is gay because the gay male who is not physically challenged is the definition of an asshole.

    Sex

    What's the best thing about having sex with 28 year olds?

    There's 20 of them.

    Democrat

    What's the difference between a five-year-old and a Democrat?

    The five-year-old doesn't expect you to do everything for them.

    (Vote for Ted Cruz, Ben Shapiro 2020)

    Pedophile

    People can say whatever they want about pedophiles. At least they are pursuing their dreams.

    In a white van.

    Democrat

    I’ve two dogs and two cats, and they are all Democrats. They want a handout everyday.

    Glove

    You're walking alone on a street when a person slaps you with a silk glove and runs away. As you watch them run, 2 cops are chasing them.

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  • Kid

    A bully walks up to a kid named Billy to insult him and steal his lunch money.

    Later that night when he is at home, the bully’s father comes into his room to insult him and take the lunch money he stole.

    The father walks down stair to check on his father in the living room. When he walks in, his father insults him and takes the lunch money.

    The grandfather of the bully walks into the back yard and in the dark is Billy. The grandfather walks up to him and says “Where’s my money, you worthless old fart?”

    Rape

    What did the first rape victim say to the second rape victim?

    "You are a consequence of rape!"

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  • Group

    Me: What do you call a group of retards?

    Friend: Down town?

    Me: Nope, target practice.

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