Your hair is receding more than people do when they smell you.
Your hairline and your eyebrows are social distancing.
The boys joking be like:
One guy: "Balls!"
All the other guys: "Hahahahaha!"
Dislike this if you think orphans are weird.
Like this if you think orphans are cool!
How many feminists does it take to fix a lightbulb?
9: one to screw the lightbulb, one to film it, one to post about it on a women empowerment social media page, one to complain that the man didn’t screw the lightbulb, one to say that women deserve to screw more lightbulbs, one to try to get #womenlightbulbscrewers trending on Twitter, one to bring a man and show him the screwing, one to say that women are better than men at screwing lightbulbs, and one to make a speech about the lightbulb.
That awkward moment when a fat kid says, “That’s how I roll.”
Why do people make orphan jokes... their parents will get mad... oh wait, never mind, please continue.
Friends = your power level.
Emo kid = power level: 0000.
Yo mama's so old, her social security number is one.
What can run, be an eyesore, and practice social distancing?
Your hairline.
Yo mama so fat that she's social distancing from herself.
Where can you never take an orphan to dinner?
Family restaurants.
I’m enyaw and I fancy my PE teacher. She is called Kelly Pearce and I go to Beckfoot Oakbank. I always watch her because I am a creep. I live at school under the stairs, but I also try [to] follow her home, and if I'm unsuccessful I look her up on a dodgy website and go on Google maps and look at her door.
I got kicked out of Social Studies class when my teacher made us watch a women's rights documentary. When he asked us what the genre of the film was, I put my hand up and said "Fiction."
Finally, some social platform where you can talk about Muslims and not get bombed.
Obv, unless you share your residence.
I bought this happy birthday card for this orphan.
To: The Orphan
From: ______
What do you do if your online friend wants to commit suicide? You can't do anything, he's already on line.
Orphan: Wanna have a sleepover?
Friend: But you're an orphan.
Orphan: Just wanted a place to sleep tonight!
I didn't know that COVID-19 was a thing until I saw your eyebrows and your hairline social distancing.
A depressed kid wanted to give me a high five.
I just left him hanging.
