Social jokes
"The rise of atheism is going to lead to a break down of social morals and lead to all kinds of filth, including an increase in child abuse," said the village priest.
The village scientists did some fact checking. In prison, they found roughly 70% of child abusers were hyper religious before committing the crimes, and another 20% converted to religions to look 'remorseful'. The remaining 10% preferred not to say. They presented the findings to the media.
"Scientists slander good religious folk and ignore the weight of evidence!"
"Is Science biased against religion? You decide in this survey," they reported.
The village priest is living at his majesty's convenience and tells the others he committed armed robbery.
"Why is this a joke? It's not even funny!" said the person reading this, breaking the forth wall.
What is funny is you got to the end of this post and didn't cringe. Why not?
What's an orphan's least favorite meme? "Family."
I did not believe in COVID-19 until I saw your teeth social distancing.
Me: Mom, the weight scale wants your weight, not your phone number!
Your hair is receding more than people do when they smell you.
Your hairline and your eyebrows are social distancing.
The boys joking be like:
One guy: "Balls!"
All the other guys: "Hahahahaha!"
Dislike this if you think orphans are weird.
Like this if you think orphans are cool!
How many feminists does it take to fix a lightbulb?
9: one to screw the lightbulb, one to film it, one to post about it on a women empowerment social media page, one to complain that the man didn’t screw the lightbulb, one to say that women deserve to screw more lightbulbs, one to try to get #womenlightbulbscrewers trending on Twitter, one to bring a man and show him the screwing, one to say that women are better than men at screwing lightbulbs, and one to make a speech about the lightbulb.
That awkward moment when a fat kid says, “That’s how I roll.”
Nobody likes you because you are an orphan.
Why do people make orphan jokes... their parents will get mad... oh wait, never mind, please continue.
Friends = your power level.
Emo kid = power level: 0000.
What do you call an orphan's family portrait?
A selfie.
What’s it called when an orphan takes a photo?
A family picture.
Yo mama's so old, her social security number is one.
What can run, be an eyesore, and practice social distancing?
Your hairline.
Yo mama so fat that she's social distancing from herself.
Where can you never take an orphan to dinner?
Family restaurants.
I’m enyaw and I fancy my PE teacher. She is called Kelly Pearce and I go to Beckfoot Oakbank. I always watch her because I am a creep. I live at school under the stairs, but I also try [to] follow her home, and if I'm unsuccessful I look her up on a dodgy website and go on Google maps and look at her door.