Social Event jokes

I just got off the phone with Kristen Stewart yesterday. She said I was invited to her cookout this Friday. I said I'll come by and bring some drinks, like wine, beer, and liquor, so we can get our freak on all night and drink some cherry wine until daybreak ends.

The lasagna I just cooked is for me, my friends, and family. You don't get none because your name is not on the list. You wanna know why? 'Cause you got the whole place smelling like catdog and ass.

Why did the autistic ice cream run away from the party?

She had a meltdown.

I had a party the other day. I made sure there were vegan options. They make do or fuck off.

Why can't orphans go to homecoming? Because they don't have a home to go to.

Why can't the skeleton go to the prom?

Because he had no-BODY to go with!

There will be better punchlines at BlessedBrian’s FUNERAL than in his JOKES.

I invited my friend with a vasectomy to a party.

Unfortunately, he couldn't come.

Yo mama so ugly, when she went to the ugly club, they said, "Sorry, professionals only!"

Why did the guy bring a rope to the party?

Because he wanted to hang out... permanently. 💀😈

Why don't booties get invited to parties?

They tend to CRACK people up!

What did the house wear to the party? A dress.

What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball? She gagged!

We are drunk at the party. There was an ass-ton of drunk girls there with me.

Hey guys, I have a question.

Doesn't everyone's parents tell them don't take candy from strangers? Then what is Halloween?

Prom (DYM 85).

I was at a funeral. I kissed a hot girl I did not know. She was the one that died.

Me: I call my girl Cinderella.

Friend: Why?

Me: Because she loves balls.

If we get this to 1000 dislikes, I will do TWO joking keggars on Halloween.

So what are you waiting for? Hit the button, idiot.

Lol, 1 week anniversary of me being on Worst Jokes Ever...

J0K35: *LETS START A JOKING KEGGAR*

A Joking keggar is where I get you drunk with some jokes, only on a special occasion.

Okay, y'all ready to get drunk with raging jokes? OK LETS GOOOOo

What do you call an LGBTQ+ disc jockey?

A DG (dee gay)

What does lava use when it can't walk properly?

A volCANEo

What do crackheads do when a black man got brutalized?

They start a HIGHot (say it like hi-ot, _riot_)

What is Satan's favorite DJ?

MarshHELLo

What do neck breakers use?

Snapchat

What did Twitter and Reddit eat with chocolate and marshmallows?

Instagraham crackers

Is this the last joke?

No

What is similar between a dog and my ex?

They are both commonly known as bitches

What number has a flu from a pig?

Nine flu (swine flu)

What did the loaf say when he was playing hide and seek?

BREADY OR NOT? HERE I GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Who is the best anime girl?

Well, it's pretty obvious 02 is on the second rank

Why did Sally get caned?

Because old men hurriCANED.

That was all

OR WAS IT?

Yes, it was (Come back on Halloween for another Joking Keggar)