Smell jokes
A man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner.
The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?"
"No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.
"Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?" the man asked.
"No, I don't waste time fishing," the homeless man said. "I spend all my time trying to stay alive."
"Will you spend this on green fees at a golf course instead of food?" the man asked.
"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't played golf in 20 years!"
"Will you spend the money on a woman in the red light district instead of food?" the man asked.
"What disease would I get for ten lousy bucks?" exclaimed the homeless man.
"Well," said the man, "I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."
The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty and I probably smell pretty disgusting."
The man replied, "That's okay. It's important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up beer, fishing, golf and sex."
How do you get a blonde to drown? You tell them the bottom of the pool smells weird.
What's green and smells like joemama? Shit from a cock.
If your nose runs and your feet smell, you are probably built upside down.
Yo mama is so stupid, she tried to smell her own nose.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Smell mop.
Smell mop who?
Hi guys, I'm back! So I have a question for you. What is red and smells like blue paint? Type in comments what you came up with.
Why does new pavement smell like butt?
In other words you can also call it asphalt.
Ass-phalt.
Get shanked with a lamb shank with a stinky pampa in the tolpan.
What do you call an Indian that doesn’t smell?
Asif
Your hair is receding more than people do when they smell you.
Yo mama so smelly, she’s even banned from the perfume store!
What is brown and smelly? Is it a fart? Is it a carcass? Wrong, it's a dirty toilet.
1. What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping?
A dino-snore!
2. What is fast, loud, and crunchy?
A rocket chip!
3. Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?
Because she was stuffed!
4. What has ears but cannot hear?
A cornfield!
5. What did the left eye say to the right eye?
Between us, something smells!
So... here's da scoop, alright... *licks KFC off lips* so, I was caught having sex wit three 6 year olds (girls btw, just in case you guys get mad) and da judge told me I was getting da death penalty, you know what I mean?
I had a last resort to save myself though, you feel me? So I told da judge, I said to him, I said: "Yo honah, 6 + 6 + 6 = 18, you smell me?"
Needless to say, I was announced a fre-e-e-e-e-e-e man after dat, you feel me?
But then, the Predator Poachers nigckas just barged into the courtroom and they said: 4 + 4 + 5 = 13!
Alas, I'm writing this joke from jail, and judging by the look my prisonmate Tyrone is giving me, I'll be writing jokes from hell from now on.
So I guess Ice Cube was right, Eazy's dick smelling like MC Ren's shit, and Eazy died of AIDS.
I'm bored. If you want to friend me in Roblox, my username is Talitha95g and my nickname is talithafromamirica.
Why did the baker's hands smell of shit?
He kneaded a turd.
Nobody knows how bad you smell.
What do black lesbians say about pussy?
"Smells like chicken, tastes like chicken."