Size

Size jokes

Difference

What's the difference between a Hippo and a Zippo?

One is gigantic, the other is just a little lighter.

Insult

Bully: You're so short you hand-glide on a chip.

Short person: Well, at least I don’t look like a giraffe that just came out of an oven!

Dick pic

When you send your girl a dick pic, but she says it's small, so you text back and say:

"Enjoy the little things."

Mama

Your mama so fat, when she stepped on the scale, it said, "One at a time."

Mom

Your mom is so fat, every time she turns around, it's her birthday.

Midget

What do you say to a black midget?

Wanna a shower? You look like you got splashed by a muddy puddle.

Mom

Your mom is so fat Buzz Lightyear had to say "To infinity to beyond" to leave her house.

Mum

Your mum (mom) so fat, she wore a yellow T-shirt, they said "Taxi!"

Child

Children

Children are like pills.

The smaller they are, the easier they are to take.

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  • Bar

    A Snorlax was in a bar, and he was drinking beer when an Eevee and a Rockruff hopped onto a stool. The Eevee ordered an oran berry special for the both of them.

    Snorlax: Y'all make the perfect couple.

    Random Zorua: Dragonite, is it just an illusion, or is that Snorlax fatter than this region?

    Whale

    Suzy: How did Jonah fit in the whale?

    Teacher: Whales are very big but have small mouths, so Jonah did not actually fit in the whale.

    Suzy: Well, the Bible says he did.

    Teacher: He did not.

    Suzy: When I get to heaven I will ask him how he fit in.

    Teacher: How do you know he went to heaven? Maybe he went to hell.

    Suzy: Then you can ask him.

    Mama

    Yo mama so fat when she goes to the shoe store, she needs to take their advice and get XXXXL.