Size

Size jokes

Mama

Your mama so fat that when you were born, yo mama gave you carpet burn.

Ladder

You’re so short, you must need a ladder to reach your advice and dreams.

Maker

It looks like a runner bean, only smaller.

From the makers of Mangeone...

Insult

Bully: You're so short you hand-glide on a chip.

Short person: Well, at least I don’t look like a giraffe that just came out of an oven!

Difference

What's the difference between a Hippo and a Zippo?

One is gigantic, the other is just a little lighter.

Mom

Your mom is so fat Buzz Lightyear had to say "To infinity to beyond" to leave her house.

Mum

Your mum (mom) so fat, she wore a yellow T-shirt, they said "Taxi!"

Dick pic

When you send your girl a dick pic, but she says it's small, so you text back and say:

"Enjoy the little things."

Mom

Your mom is so fat, every time she turns around, it's her birthday.