Size jokes
Your forehead is so big, the moon landing was there.
I tell short people to reach for the stars.
They are always a bit short of reach.
A little girl and a little boy are taking a bath together when the little girl looks down and asks, "What's that?"
The little boy says, "That’s my little red race car."
Ten minutes later, the boy looks down and asks, "What's that?"
The little girl says, "That’s my little red race car garage."
So later that night, the little boy asks the little girl if he can put his little red race car in her little red race car garage. She said yes, and then they pull down their pants and the boy tries putting his little red race car in her garage, but it won’t fit.
Downstairs, the mother hears an ear-piercing scream and runs up the stairs, flips on the lights and sees blood on the floor. The mother asks, "What happened?"
The little girl says, "We tried putting his car in my garage and it wouldn’t fit, so I cut the back wheels off."
Yo mama's so fat, when she went to the beach in a blue dress, everyone screamed "tsunami!"
Yo mama so fat that she was the float in the Thanksgiving Day Parade with Kermit the Frog!
I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting larger. Then it hit me.
Yo mama so fat that when she attempted suicide, she bounced to Area 51.
Me: God, Bryce, do we really have to talk about this again?
Bryce: What?
Me: You're still talking shit!! I already told you! It's 9 inches! Stop saying it's 3!
P.S. I'm a girl.
Yo mama so fat it took Nationwide three years to get on her good side.
The Earth used to be flat until they buried yo mama.
When your girlfriend says it is too small, you say, "Just enjoy the small thing."
America get pranked lol.
Biden's penis is probably as big as the Twin Towers right now.
Oh wait...
Yo mama so fat that when she landed on the moon, instead of saying "One small step for man kind," she said, "One small step for world domination!"
Your mama is so fat, when I think of her in my head, she just broke my neck.
Your mama so fat when she sits on the toilet it sings, "ABC, 123, get your fat ass off of me!"
You're so fat that when you were born, the nurse mistook you for the father.
Why can't orphans have chips? Because it's family size.
Yo mama so fat, when she play a game, everybody lags.
Yo mama's so fat, I swerved to miss her in my car and ran out of gas.
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes camping, the bears hide their food.