Size jokes
Yo mama so fat...
What do you call a short fortune-teller that escaped from jail?
A small medium at large.
The pinnacle of loyalty is that an ant married an elephant, and after he died, she spent her entire life burying him :)
Explain Bear weighs 1 ton.
Your forehead is so big, explorers mistakenly thought it was Mount Everest.
Did you know Yao Ming has the biggest penis in Chinese history? It measured in at nearly 5 inches!
There were three Indians that got kicked out of the tribe.
One said, "Me find food," and he came back with a decent size rabbit. The other two asked him what happened. He said, "Me see rabbit, me shoot rabbit, and rabbit fall down dead."
The 2nd Indian, "Me find food." He came back with a good sized deer. The other two asked him what happened. He said, "Me see deer, me shoot deer, deer fall down dead."
The third Indian said, "Me find food." He came back crawling, missing a leg and an arm, and he was all cut up. The others asked what happened. He said, "Me see train, me shoot train, train no stop!"
Your forehead looks like the inside of a Malteser.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Atoms are small, But so are you!
"SCOOT WANT TAXI!" Ok, maybe I do but can't make it there because yo mama is so fat he can't hear me on the other side.
Yo mama so fat, NASA used her stomach to jump to Uranus in seconds.
Yo mama so fat when she laid on a water bed, she laid on the whole Pacific Ocean.
Jacob has a small penis.
No matter how big the jar, there is one thing that can never fit inside it. What is it?
All I can see when I pass Saturn is Uranus because it's so big.
Fatty and Skinny sitting in a bed.
Fatty rolled over, and Skinny was dead.
What can a dwarf do standing up that a tall person can't do standing up?
Suck a big dick.
What did the minute hand say to the hour hand?
Why are you so tall?
What's big and black?
My balls.
I was walking home when I saw children crossing the street on their own. I went towards him and tapped his shoulder and said, "Hey, little kid, you are not supposed to be walking on your own." The kid turns out to be a dwarf.