Size jokes

Yo mama so fat, NASA used her stomach to jump to Uranus in seconds.

Yo mama so fat when she laid on a water bed, she laid on the whole Pacific Ocean.

Jacob has a small penis.

All I can see when I pass Saturn is Uranus because it's so big.

Fatty and Skinny sitting in a bed.

Fatty rolled over, and Skinny was dead.

What can a dwarf do standing up that a tall person can't do standing up?

Suck a big dick.

No matter how big the jar, there is one thing that can never fit inside it. What is it?

What's big and black?

My balls.

What did the minute hand say to the hour hand?

Why are you so tall?

I was walking home when I saw children crossing the street on their own. I went towards him and tapped his shoulder and said, "Hey, little kid, you are not supposed to be walking on your own." The kid turns out to be a dwarf.

Your forehead is so big, the moon landing was there.

I tell short people to reach for the stars.

They are always a bit short of reach.

A little girl and a little boy are taking a bath together when the little girl looks down and asks, "What's that?"

The little boy says, "That’s my little red race car."

Ten minutes later, the boy looks down and asks, "What's that?"

The little girl says, "That’s my little red race car garage."

So later that night, the little boy asks the little girl if he can put his little red race car in her little red race car garage. She said yes, and then they pull down their pants and the boy tries putting his little red race car in her garage, but it won’t fit.

Downstairs, the mother hears an ear-piercing scream and runs up the stairs, flips on the lights and sees blood on the floor. The mother asks, "What happened?"

The little girl says, "We tried putting his car in my garage and it wouldn’t fit, so I cut the back wheels off."

Your forehead is so big, you think in 4K.

Your mum is so fat, when she reached for the remote, when she found it, it was crushed.

I swear, if I compared the size of your mother and multiplied it by the time your dad was gone, it wouldn't even be close to your hairline.

Yo mama's so fat her belly button has an echo.

Yo mama so fat, when she talks to herself, it’s a long-distance call.

Your mama so fat when she sits on the toilet it sings, "ABC, 123, get your fat ass off of me!"

Your mama is so fat, when I think of her in my head, she just broke my neck.