Size jokes
All I can see when I pass Saturn is Uranus because it's so big.
Yo mama so fat, even Bob the Builder said, "We can't fix that!"
Where can you find some of the world's largest vegetables? -- In an American nursing home.
Why can't orphans eat a large bag of chips? Because they're family size.
Yo mama so fat, she da iceburg.
Yo mama so fat, she uses the equator as her belt.
Uranus is huge.
Yo mama so fat when she walked all we knew was EARTHQUAKE!
What do you call a dwarf with ESP that escaped a prison?
A small medium at large.
If you had the strength of an ant, you could lift the pyramid of Giza.
(Ants can lift items 20x their weight.)
You are the reason double doors were invented.
What's stiff and 6 inches long?
SIDS.
Yo mama's so fat, if she buys a fur coat, a whole species will become extinct.
Jacob has a small penis.
Yo mama so fat, when she went up the elevator, the World Trade Center collapsed.
When your girlfriend says it is too small, you say, "Just enjoy the small thing."
Yo mama so big, she thought Christopher Rhoades was a tampon.
What do you call it when a midget waves at you?
A microwave.
Yo mamma so fat, she asked for a water bed, and they put a blanket over the Atlantic Ocean.
Your forehead is so big that the teachers used it as a whiteboard.