Size jokes

Yo mama so fat, when she went sky diving everyone screamed "METEOR!!!"

Your forehead is so big that it has five different time zones!

I was walking to the store, and then this boy told me, "I'm an orphan and I have no money." He wanted M\&Ms. I gave him a family-sized bag.

Yo mama so small that she tried to hike Mountain Dew.

Yo momma's so fat, she was the iceberg in the Titanic.

I swear, if I compared the size of your mother and multiplied it by the time your dad was gone, it wouldn't even be close to your hairline.

Yo mama's so fat her belly button has an echo.

Yo mama so fat, when she talks to herself, it’s a long-distance call.

Yo mama's so fat, I swerved to miss her in my car and ran out of gas.

Yo mama's so fat, when she goes camping, the bears hide their food.

Why can't orphans eat Doritos? Because it's family size.

Why can't orphans have chips? Because it's family size.

Yo mama so fat I bet that her fart can clear a room in seconds.

I heard that your forehead is so big that you could build a neighborhood on it.

Yo mom is so fat that when she stands on a scale, she broke it, lol.

Do you ever wonder why orphans buy small cereal boxes? It's because they can't get family size.

You're so short that you use a ladder to reach a dime.

Yo mama so fat it took Nationwide three years to get on her good side.

Yo mama so fat that when she attempted suicide, she bounced to Area 51.

Me: God, Bryce, do we really have to talk about this again?

Bryce: What?

Me: You're still talking shit!! I already told you! It's 9 inches! Stop saying it's 3!

P.S. I'm a girl.