Short jokes
What does a knife have but not my life...
A point.
Why is the UK bad at chess? Because they already lost their queen.
When the person who killed JFK heard "headshot."
Why did the mailman come to the house?
To come back with the milk.
Why were the Twin Towers so good at football? They were the best wide receiver of their time!
Blind people driving on the highway would be the world's biggest, and shortest game of bumper cars!
What God do rats worship?
Cheesus.
What do you call a tall terrorist?
Osama Bin Laden.
If I like having sex and get with 15 people, are they getting sexified?
Me explaining my child: when your mom is sitting on a table during her period, it's called the periodic table.
I told the ugly friend in my friend group that when they daydream, they shouldn't picture themselves because it will just ruin it.
*True story*
I saw this guy with a very bad hairline who was painting himself blue and it said "Smurf Paint," but I shouted, "Megamind!"
Yo mama so rich,
her blood type is 24 karat GOLD!
Say what you want about Hitler, he wasn’t all that bad. After all, he killed Hitler.
If an Indian had powers, it would be throwing tika masala.
What’s the difference between a woman and a policeman? One of them have rights.
I shouted at a kid. I told him to get his parents.
It was the last time I worked at an orphanage, 🤣.
Why did the orphan sit alone in the corner?
They wanted some family time.
What's the best way to prank your blind girlfriend?
Fill her closet with see-through clothes.
What are the similarities of GTA V and 9/11? A plane can be stolen and crashed into a building by a bunch of terrorists.