What does a plug do when he's horny?
He jacks off!
Short Jokes
Finish the lyrics: Can I put my...
Somebody keeps sending me flowers with their heads cut off.
I think I'm being stalked.
A few men have curved penises, but they can fix that problem by straightening it out.
What is the difference between apples and orphans?........... The apple gets picked.
What do you call the musical kid who is very aware of his surroundings?
C sharp minor.
What do you call a bunch of retarded preschoolers? Tater tots.
My wife and children are leaving me over my obsession with horse racing.
And they're off!
"Alexa, open Kahoot!"
The dark side of kid songs:
You got a friend in me... you got a friend in me!
Waiter: "Here you go, one medium-rare steak."
Me: "I like it well done."
Waiter: "Thanks, that means a lot!"
How are genders and the Twin Towers alike?
There was 2, now it's a sensitive subject.
Why aren't orphans scared of getting in trouble at school?
Because they can't call their parents.
I posted up on my story that I got a new cut. My friends and family called the cops...
I used to be emo.
He was saying jokes, and someone said, "You are on a roll!"
Your hairline is so bad, when people see the back of your head they say "nice beard!"
"Thank God there are no of these ahahha ya thank God to pranks."
"Oh I forgot a dance šŗ š joke is good ok for kids."
What do you call a dude that is always high and gets higher than everyone else in the family? The alpha pothead!
Ever seen twins?
If you said yes, was it before or after 2001?
What's the difference between Monday and a dick?
They're not different. They're both unnecessarily long and hard.
