Short jokes
How do you know someone has Down syndrome?
They're doing better than you.
Lynx, where the fuck are you? This is Dagger Jr. (Proof in comments).
What do you call a room full of disabled people with epilepsy?
A seizure salad.
What do you call a white person having a seizure?
A saltshaker.
If it does more than pee, it's too old for me!
If you thought an inner-city black boy cannot transform into a deranged pale Karen... well, just look at Michael Jackson.
Roses are red, oranges are orange.
Get a life, quit watching porn.
What does the Bible stand for?
Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth.
Your butt is bigger than Uranus!
Why does NASA only serve Coke?
Because they can't get Seven-Up!
For one of the most highly regarded minds on the planet, it is a shame he could not create a longer-lasting battery.
Don't bully.
What's the difference between a water bottle and Africa?
One has water; the other one doesn’t.
Your mother is such a slut, she should be in the NFL hall of fame for the greatest wide receiver!
What is Beethoven doing right now?
Nothing, because he is dead.
What's more fun than nailing a baby to the floor?
Ripping it off with a kick!
I like my women how I like my cigarettes: Smokin’ hot, and with a little saliva on the butt.
What is a porn star's favourite potato crisp flavour...
Prawn cocktail.
Then: You want free candy?
Now: You want free Wi-Fi?
What do you call a mushroom that makes music?
A decomposer.