Short jokes

Short jokes

Orphan

What do orphans and fathers have in common? They both don't have families to go to.

Friend

I would have a joke for my friend... but he can't afford the punchline.

Lightsaber

Every time a Light Saber goes off, it's just a Jedi Master getting hard over a kid. Lol.

Hell

When people tell me to "go to hell," I tell them their address.

Emo

There are perks to bringing an emo to the grocery store; you can get coupons by scanning their wrist.

Politician

If you got a priest, a Rhodes scholar, and a politician in a room, what would you get?

The Royal Commission.

Alternatively, Tony Abbott.

Penis

What's the difference between a gun and a penis?

The American government does not define you as having the constitutional right to a penis.

Peace

Hitler only wanted peace.

A piece of Poland, a piece of Czechoslovakia, and a piece of Turkey.

Vampire

What do you get when you cross a vampire with a teacher?

Lots of blood tests!

Mother

"Jesus can turn water into wine, but I can turn your mother into mine."

- Sun Tzu, *The Art of Creating War*

Camp

"If you want to win swiftly, camp the enemies' spawn."

- Sun Tzu

Strategy

"If we don’t have a strategy, then the enemy will never know our strategy."

-Sun Tzu, Art of War.