Short jokes
Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It's fine, he woke up.
What do you call a bus full of white people?
A TWINKiE!!!
Where is an elephant’s penis?
On their feet, because if you get trampled on, you’re fucked.
What do you do when you get rid of prostate cancer?
Cell-ablate!
How do they execute paraplegics?
With the electric wheelchair.
This whole page is pure trash. Fuck all of you.
What did the chef on the Titanic scream as he tried to finish the dishes? "Oh no, the sink sank!"
What do you call a flying octopus?
An octocopter! 🚁
One time I ate a chair.
Why are so many people mean to orphans?
They can’t cry to their parents.
Why did the hedgehog cross the road?
To get to the other side (suicide).
Why did the second hedgehog cross the road?
To see his flatmate.
Why did the sexy 12 year old girl with cerebral palsy get raped? Because her parents didn’t have the decency to drown her at birth.
Man: Can you be my girlfriend?
Woman: I'm lesbian, sorry.
Man: Oh, here's your rope.
Why is he ourple?
If she refuses to suck and threatens to bite, just knock her teeth out. Call it the “Bloody Gummer”.
What do ants and Michael Jackson have in common? They go in kids' pants.
Why do people always talk about nine eleven???
My dad died that day.
He was a good pilot.
Why did the octopus blush?
He saw the bottom of the ocean.
What is the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean?
I've never had a garbanzo bean on my face for my birthday.
What's the difference between a skeleton and a baby? I don't set the skeleton on fire.