Short jokes
Mushroom?
Q: Why are the 49ers called the 49ers?
A: 'Cause they can't make it past the 50-yard line.
Creeper?
What does a cow use in school? A cowculator.
What is Thanos's favorite video game?
Pokémon Snap.
Video games don't make people violent, lag does.
I told a chemist a joke.
No reaction.
What is the difference between an orphan and a deaf kid?
They can't hear or speak to their parents that never came back.
Do you guys know what KFC stands for? It stands for kidnapping foster children.
Are you a gun, because I would be your bullets because I love going in children.
I don't know why we have to make jokes about this, it's already a joke.
Q: What do you call deaf Magic Johnson?
A: Hearing Aids.
I met a girl that was 6'5" and she fell on 9/11 and broke her arm. She really said "oh snap" like a twin tower.
The amount of women judging me for raping a poor lady is terrible. You weren't there. You don't know!
Why is hangman always done in black ink?
To make it more realistic.
Why did the cheese go to therapy? Because it had too many emotional holes.
Why was the slave so happy? Because he got his master's degree.
Once my girlfriend asked me to give her lipstick, and I accidentally gave her the glue stick.
She won't talk to me anymore.
Wanna know something the orphan could never do?
Wish anyone a happy Mother’s Day or Father’s Day.
The fact that I am high won't stop me from advising you.
Don't plug your phone while charging it; it is very dangerous.