When you're exercising and you feel the “gush.”
Short Jokes
Your mum is so smart, but she still can’t figure out why she had you.
What's the difference between the Titanic and Georgie from "It"?
Georgie floated!
What did the cow say to the fat pig?
Moooooooove over!
They told me I'd never be good at poetry.
But to date I have made 3 jugs and a vase, and they look lovely!
Yo momma so stupid... weather man says it's chilly outside... instead of a jacket, she gets a bowl and spoon!
There's a difference between my brother and Stephen Hawking.
At least Stephen Hawking does something.
When the school lets you near children again...
What do you call a duck on drugs?
A quackhead.
People having seizures are just people dreaming about rollercoasters.
How can you tell if an ant is a boy or a girl?
If it sinks it’s a girl. If it floats, it’s boy-ant (buoyant).
Everything is made in China, except babies... They are made in Vachina.
I was gonna tell a rumor about butter, but I don’t want to spread it.
Oofer.
"Bippidy boppidy boo! Bill Cosby is coming for you!"
There are 50 dogs and 48 cats.
How many are hungry?
A. 10
What did Thanos say when he snapped his finger? Another one bites the dust.
Ex-Boyfriend: You have no ass, so we're through!
Me: Stop being a dickhead, dude!! It ain't gonna make your little sausage any bigger!
Angel: Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven?
Satan: Could you like FUCK OFF FOR ONE MINUTE?
What do a friend and a mouse have in common? They will both be angry if you throw bricks at them.
