Short jokes
What do you call a disabled gang member? A crip.
Did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and leg?
He's all right.
What is the definition of confusion?
Three blind lesbians in a fish market.
It's been 2 years since I've been on this. Hello, guys!
Wanna know why Kobe can't shoot?
Because he's dead.
Your hairline is so big, Niagara Falls said, "Oh, looks like we've got some competition!"
One good thing about lynching during the holidays, free tree ornaments.
What's the worst place to teach an orphan? Homeschool.
Why was the slave so happy? Because he got his master's degree.
The amount of women judging me for raping a poor lady is terrible. You weren't there. You don't know!
Why did the cheese go to therapy? Because it had too many emotional holes.
What is a group of singing terrorists called? A Taliband.
What's the difference between me and a hairdresser? We both cut too much.
A computer is like a living organism. Its charger is its life support. If you "pull the plug," you are letting it slowly die.
The flag at NAMBLA headquarters is flying at half mast.
Why do orphans eat an ice cream cone?? They can't afford a family pack.
I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up.
You: Hey, Alexa, what is your gender?
Alexa: I identify as Michael Jackson, and my pronouns are...
Me: *hears it* And their pronouns are he/he.
What's at least 6 inches long and goes in your mouth, and it's more fun if it vibrates?
A toothbrush.
What is six inches, goes in your mouth, and it's fun when it vibrates? A toothbrush.