Short jokes
What does Germany and the rest of the world have in common? They both use gases to poison one thing or another.
So I ran into my specialist doctor, and he said, "Pick a star sign, any star sign." So I said, "Capricorn," and he said, "Nah, you got cancer."
If a clown farted, would it smell funny?
One day a cow ate a fish.
What came out the other side?
A dead fish.
Why did a woman believe she was a target? She had a price tag without any value to it.
Among Us players after saying "Self Report!" to the police officers who find a dead body in their basement.
What did the Nazi order from Wendy's?
Two number NEINs.
What's big, green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree, it can kill you?
A pool table.
Why are drums and autistic people the same?
They both go "uh uh uh uh uh uh!"
Why would hunting a bald eagle in America be a bad idea?
Because it's ill-eagle.
Which one of Lord Arthur's knights invented the round table?
Sir Cumference.
Don’t have phone sex without protection, you might get hearing aids!
What's the difference between pussy and pizza... nothing because I'll eat them both.
Why aren't women taken seriously in the world? They are too busy whining about getting raped.
Q: What do American beer and canoes have in common?
A: Fu@king close to water!
Why did Annie fall from the swing?
Because she had no hands.
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
Not Annie.
What is a reverse exorcism?
It’s when the demon tells the priest to get out of the child’s body.
There’s so many protests. Every time I see "my body, my choice," I can’t tell if we’re protesting the masks or trying to kill babies.
123 bipity bopity 321. Women are property.
Why do people watch hentai?
Because they are as fake as pornstars are.