Short jokes
Yo mama so poor, she used a KFC bucket as a rain hat.
What's the difference between me and a hairdresser? We both cut too much.
I swear I always finish on page 3 when I'm looking at family pictures.
If McDonald's is fast food, then Dairy Queen is fast cream.
Why did God create yeast infections?
So women would know what it's like to live with an annoying cunt.
Yo mama so fat, when God said, "Let there be light," He was just asking her to move.
What is the worst part about siblings having sex?
Being left out.
Why don’t some couples go to the gym?
Because some relationships don’t work out.
How do you make a lesbian upset?
Give her a multiplication test.
What’s the difference between a Black man and a Jew?
One was born burnt.
I was at a train station and a woman ran up to me and asked, "Is this train running on time?" I said, "No, it runs on steam and coal."
Who needs dating apps when you have family reunions?
My son told me he has to bring an object for show and tell at school.
So I had him bring my wife.
I hit myself on a window yesterday. I really felt the pane.
Why are all Asians so skinny?
Because last time there was a fat man a whole population disappeared.
One good thing about lynching during the holidays, free tree ornaments.
Wanna know why Kobe can't shoot?
Because he's dead.
Your hairline is so big, Niagara Falls said, "Oh, looks like we've got some competition!"
Why can't orphans be gay?
They don't have a closet to come out of.
If someone is bullying you for being fat, remember, you're the bigger person, a MUCH bigger person.