Short jokes
If someone is bullying you for being fat, remember, you're the bigger person, a MUCH bigger person.
Your hairline is so long that when you finally found the length of it, you told someone and they said, "Don't give me your phone number."
Last week a girl asked me for sex. I had to disappoint her... so I said yes.
What's the worst place to teach an orphan? Homeschool.
Why did my foot cross the road?
Because your ass was on the other side.
Yo mama so fat, when she passed by the TV, I missed a whole season of SpongeBob.
Chiropractor: Final neck adjustment in 3, 2, 1. How did that feel?
Me: *silence*
The man was dangling by a string!
I was jealous the day he died.
The devil's number is 346 because you will be in jail.
Adolf Hitler + Vladimir Putin = Vladolf Putler.
The flag at NAMBLA headquarters is flying at half mast.
How did Michael Jackson challenge the victim's parents? "Then why won't you slap my face, because I'm bad?"
What is the worst tool to play when playing the game “Icebreaker”?
The Titanic.
If you hate pedophiles, grow up.
Which book takes an extreme turn and has an incredible plot twist?
- The math book. Suddenly letters appear in the calculations...
What's at least 6 inches long and goes in your mouth, and it's more fun if it vibrates?
A toothbrush.
What is six inches, goes in your mouth, and it's fun when it vibrates? A toothbrush.
What is 6 inches and long?
A Slim Jim.
Bro, your hairline is still missing. Even Dora the Explorer can't discover it!
I just came across a pile of cash in the parking lot.
Usually I just use tissues.