My uncle died on nine eleven... he was the best pilot in Iraq.
Short Jokes
Stephen Hawking's death was simply an accident. He pressed power off instead of sleep mode.
How do they execute paraplegics?
With the electric wheelchair.
"Hippity hoppity, the school shooter spotted me."
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He tried to update to Windows 10, and his hard drive corrupted.
What do you do when you hear your wife squirming around in the back yard?
Reload... chhchhhh.
What did the man say to the woman? "Make me a sandwich."
Why did the cat meow?
Because it's a cat, and they meow.
If olive oil is made of olives, then baby oil is made of...
How did the Mexican girl get pregnant? Her teacher told her to do his essay.
Why did the hedgehog cross the road?
To get to the other side (suicide).
Why did the second hedgehog cross the road?
To see his flatmate.
"Consent is just some fucked up feminist propaganda."
Smack an orphan, what’s he gonna do... tell his parents?
What's another name for an Incel? A feminist.
My aim is cursed; one of my Angry Birds hit a field.
What do you get when you cross breed a bear with a retarded person?
A feminist (a hairy and brainless beast).
My fortune cookie said, "Your existing plans will succeed." Not necessarily, since I'm suicidal...
What do you call a winter time contact?
A Santa Claus.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
Who can jump the highest?
Emos, some of them are still in the air.
