Short jokes
Husband: Hey honey, words can’t describe how beautiful you are.
Wife: Aww, thanks.
Husband: But numbers can. 0 out of 10.
My ex is like AIDS! I can't get rid of him.
I'm lookin' for some good jokes for the best song award. Can y'all help a fellow out?
Qwen is a liar (sent with a dance).
Why did the cowboy put his bunk in the fireplace?
'Cause he wanted to sleep like a log!
What do you call a Russian pharmacist?
"Ivan Astichestykov."
Why does it take so long for the pirates to learn the alphabet?
Because they spend years on C! Pirate: A, B, sea?
A man tells his doctor, "Doc, help me. I’m addicted to Twitter!"
The doctor replies, "Sorry, I don’t follow you..."
Get a head in life by decapitating someone.
Why did two fours skip lunch? They already ate.
What happens to grapes when you step on them? They wine.
What kind of animal falls from the sky?
Answer: A raindeer.
Why do G-Unit and C-Unit stand for? Gorilla unit and chimpanzee unit.
Why did the turkey cross the road twice?
To prove he wasn't chicken!
Did you hear the gossip about butter? Never mind, I butter not spread it...
What couldn’t the boy in the wheelchair do when he saw a bully? He couldn’t stand up for himself.
Why do special ed classes have fans?
To keep the vegetables nice and fresh.
Where does a snowman keep his money?
In a snowbank.
I sleep in a castle once every 2 weeks.
It's my fort knight.
A man walked into a bar...
Ouch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!