Short jokes
Emma Watson gets hotter and hotter in the Harry Potter movies when you’re watching in reverse order.
Yesterday, there was a blackout on my street.
So I sold them.
What is better to have, autism, Down syndrome, or ADHD?
What did Chris Brown say the first time he saw Rihanna?
I’d hit that.
My 19-year-old girl killed a butterfly. I said no butter for you.
She then she killed a cockroach. I told her nice try.
What's the LGBTQ+'s favorite cereal?
Fruity Pebbles.
What’s a fun game to play during a pride parade?
Capture the flag.
What's the difference between a gay man and a freezer?
A freezer doesn't scream when you put meat inside it.
How is a priest like a wristwatch?
They both start at 12.
Are you a haunted house? Because I’m going to scream when I’m in you! 😫
Did you make your bed this morning? Wanna unmake it together?
Are you a blanket? Because I love it when you’re on top of me.
I hope you remembered my name since you’ll be screaming it later.
What’s the difference between women and cars?
At least cars retain some of their value after getting wrecked.
What song do you play at an emo kid's funeral?
Van Halen's "Jump."
What did the cow say to the leather chair?
“Hi Mom!”
I just broke up with my mathematician girlfriend. She was obsessed with an X.
I got LEGOs for Christmas, and my friend got her father's headstone.
My sister said to roast her, but my mom said I'm not allowed to burn trash.
"Stupidity isn’t a crime, so you’re free to go."