Short jokes
Guys, don’t put the Holocaust books in the fiction section, it was the worst mistake of my life!
What would happen if a dam broke when you are on it?
You would be dam unlucky.
Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing?
In case they get a hole in one!
Why are half the orphans missing? Because I took them, of course! :]
Gather 6 friends to play Russian roulette, and one's mind will be blown away.
I watch my parents sleep with a knife in my hands. Only got caught once.
What’s the definition of “perfect pitch?”
Throwing a viola into the dumpster without hitting the rim.
Why don’t violists play hide and seek?
Because no one will look for them.
Did you know the past tense of William Shakespeare is Wouldiwas Shookspeared?
Q: Why can't orphans ever win at Yahtzee?
A: Because they can never seem to get a full house.
How are Fortnite cards and orphans similar? They're given away.
Honestly, Ukraine is just built to annoy Russia.
Presidents are normal, physically.
Biden: Trips over a f***ing stair.
What do you call an orphan in a room full of mirrors? Surrounded by loved ones.
What you call suicide, I call a failed speedrun attempt.
GOTTVERDAMMT, Hans! I said, "Glass of juice," not "Gas the Jews!"
You're so ugly you make the blind kids cry 😭😭
I told an orphan to never stop talking until their parents come home.
Now I can’t get it to shut up.
Yo dad's so stupid, he came back after he got the milk.
Why are astronauts forgetful?
They're always spacing out.