What's black and never works?
Decaffeinated coffee, you racist bastard!
Short Jokes
What’s the difference between a feminist and a rock?
A rock can break a glass ceiling.
What do you call a funny family of chairs? A sitcom!
Why did the kid with Down syndrome get expelled?
He was always tardy.
What will you call Burj Khalifa after 100 years?
"Bujurg" Khalifa. (Just a joke)
What is it about a beard and glasses that children find so sexy?
Q: What did the skeleton say when he proposed to his girlfriend?
A: Will you marrow me?
I added Paul Walker on my Xbox, but all he does is sit on the dashboard.
What was the last thing that crossed Princess Diana's mind?
The steering wheel.
What did Hitler get for his 6th birthday?
A Kewpie burger and an Easy-Bake Oven.
"Ching chong, drop the bomb!"
In my house, good sex sounds like seals slapping each other.
You're so fat, no one was laughing, but the floor was cracking!
If 80% of all suicides in the UK are males, and women want equality, then maybe they should just kill themselves.
What do you call a man with a curly toe?
Carlito.
Where did Milky Way get its degree?
At the university.
Do you have a shovel in your back pocket?
Why?
'Cause I’m digging that ass.
I work with animals!
What do you do?
I’m a butcher.
Person 1: Did you hear the joke bout 9/11?
Person 2: No, but it'll probably crash and burn.
My uncle died on nine eleven... he was the best pilot in Iraq.
