Short jokes
Why did God create yeast infections?
So women would know what it's like to live with an annoying cunt.
A Thai woman ran into a wall. What does she break?
Her boner.
Why should you fear white people in prison instead of the blacks?
Because you know that whites are in for actually committing something.
Roses are red, My friend is choking. That stupid bitch shouldn't have eaten my muffin.
What did Nemo say to the emo?
"Be careful, you can't Nemo your way out of emo."
How tall does the grass grow in Germany?
Zis high!
What do you call it when a man wants food in Panera?
Panera bread serving food.
What does the Trump administration use instead of emails? Alternative fax.
One thing you can ask Mario:
"Can you jump up and down for me?"
Do you think you can solve a riddle about my penis because I don't think you can...
It's too hard.
When you know that everyone thinks you're a hoe.
WHEN Y'ALL ARE MY HOES!
Allan: What are you doing Saturday night? Museum girl: Committing suicide. Allan: What about Friday night?
Why did the rapper bring a suitcase to the studio?
Because he was packing his rhyme books!
Wilt Chamberlain may have spread his seed among many women, but Kobe spread his brain matter all over California.
The "W" in African stands for water.
What's the difference between apples and dead babies?
I don't ejaculate on apples before I eat them.
What kind of fish knows how to do an appendectomy? A sturgeon!
What did the doctor say to the potato?
It told it it had tuberculosis.
What kind of fish knows math?
An anglerfish LOL
When you have an ex, you will notice that the word "ex" is short for "executed," so that's there for yous.