Short jokes
Why do orphans love to play family?
Because it's the closest they will be to being normal.
Why did the orphan get sent to the principal's office?
Because he punched dumbos like you people!
Never let an orphan watch Fast and the Furious.
All they will talk about is how great their family is.
Is that ass a water barrier 'cause dam[n]?
A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Wow, I've never served a weasel before, what can I get you?" "Pop," goes the weasel.
I had to stop drinking because I got tired of waking up in my car, driving 90.
You soak balls, get it?
Runescape is the only form of birth control that is 100% effective.
If Asians have face scanners... do they all have the same face scanner?
The first thing a man looks at in a woman, is her heart.
The fact that her breasts block the view is not her fault.
What do you call 2 homeless people throwing rocks at each other? "Pillow Fight!"
"I'm sorry, Wendy, but I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die."
Communism is actually kinda tight.
What did the coal say to the charcoal?
You look pretty coal! 🤣
How is a child molester and Harambe the same? They both get shot for touching little kids.
For all the Harry Potter fans:
A VPN is occlumency for smart devices, and our ISP is a legilimens.
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None, that's a hardware problem.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't. 61.
What’s the best thing about dating an orphan?
You don’t need parental consent.
Bro, are you an Oompa Loompa? Because you look like you just came from the chocolate factory.