Short jokes
What did the science textbook say to the math textbook?
You've got a lot of problems!
Here’s another joke my friend told me.
What did the school shooter do when the librarian told him to be quiet? Pulled out a silencer.
What’s the difference between a child and someone who has been kidnapped?
One of them is a domesticated pet.
Are you sad? Then don't be sad, because sad backwards is das, and das no good.
Q: What did one gay cowboy say to the other gay cowboy?
A: Hayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!
The first rule of the Alzheimer’s club is...
Wait, where are we again?
Wow, my own joke. Category: I problem won’t remember this.
Bunger.
Welcome to the Fast Food Divorce Center where yesterday's lies are today's fries.
You're the type of person to wash your hands after a shower.
You're so fat, when people see you running, they can't help but yell out, "Keep running!"
Why was the kid's report card all wet?
Because it was below "sea" level.
Why can't orphans eat at a family restaurant?
Because there is no family.
A list of Sans puns would be Sans-tastic!
What's a chicken's deadliest day?
Friday.
Are you my fish? Because you're supposed to be dead.
What did the headless horseman say to the woman?
"Give me head."
When I was at work, I saw this kid crying. I said, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working in an orphanage.
Why can't orphans operate Apple devices?
Because they don't know how to use the home button.
What's the difference between a nuclear reactor and your step sis? You need to use protection for the nuclear reactor.