Short jokes
What happened when the teacher tied all the students' shoe laces together?
They took a class trip.
By the way, infertility is hereditary:
If your parents did not have children, you will not have any.
Why did the orphan go to the playground?
To see if it could find its parents.
Man: How do you prepare your chicken?
Waiter: Nothing special, we just tell them they’re going to die.
The fries were the slowest in the race and they said, "We need to ketchup to the tomato!"
Did you hear they made an Emo-Hipster pizza?
It cuts itself, and you're supposed to eat it before it's cool.
What is a leaf mixed with mud called? Ligma.
Ligma balls!
None of these are jokes... they're all facts!
What do you call an emo that cuts too deep? Gushers.
Why is Jesus in pieces?
Because a one man band is Nine Inch Nails.
What's the same about a newborn and a football?
You can kick them both very easily.
Joke start.
Punchline!
I bought myself the life-sized Jesus painting off of Amazon, and they had 4 nails within the pack. All I needed was 1.
The guy in the wheelchair at my gym can do so many pull-ups with the wheelchair on, but I said to him, "Don't skip leg day."
Autoerotic asphyxiation because hanging in there can be hard.
What's the difference between an orphan and a second-hand book?
The second-hand book was loved once.
Why does Michael Jackson like twenty-eight year olds?
'Cause there are twenty of them.
What was the Twin Towers favorite game? Jenga.
What are the subtitles when a disabled person speaks in a movie?
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What is an orphan’s favorite beer?
Fosters.