Short jokes
Why are Americans so bad at Clash Royale?
They already lost 2 towers.
Best not leave hungry kids unattended!
Your hairline goes so far back that even God said, "I learned about it in my days."
My wife told me I could never, ever build a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta!
What is old, cold, and alone?
An orphan's parents.
What’s the difference between your boyfriend and a condom?
A. Condoms have evolved. They’re not so thick and insensitive anymore.
What did the Taliban say to the Afghan?
Nothing, they blew him up.
What's the difference between Paul Walker and a fly? It's the sound they make when they hit the windshield.
What does Joe Biden call a room full of kids? A toy room.
Why can't emos have ADD?
'Cause they are already scatter-brained.
Why didn't the boy like his Christmas presents? Hint: They were a soccer ball, bicycle, and running shoes.
I don't see why people these days choose their gender. There's only two, it's Nerf or nothing! (I'm just joking, I honestly don't care.)
I asked my friend how long I can be in the sky. He said if you are emo, then forever.
I'm no astronomer, but I’m pretty sure the Earth revolves around the sun... not you.
Why are Asians so bad at baseball? ... Because they ate the bat!
Bleach solves so many problems: stains, dirty dishes, messes, and overpopulation.
What's the worst TV series for orphans?
Family Guy.
What’s the difference between Pikachu and an orphan?
Pikachu, I choose you!
Hey dude, can you spell IHOP?
Sure, man. I. H. O. P.
Wait, you ate my pee!!!
What was the first thing Thanos snapped?
Loki’s neck.