Short jokes
I have no friends, but then I realize my true friends are anxiety and depression.
Tuxedos suit you.
I need to go to the tailor, or so it seams.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You tell him, "Clap your hands until your mom comes."
Hairline so big people had to time travel to find the end of it.
To the guy in a wheelchair who stole my camouflage coat: you can hide, but you can't run.
My boat is super fast, so I named it Usain.
Usain Boat.
What's the difference between Santa Claus and Jews?
Santa Claus gets to leave the chimney alive.
If your blind girlfriend says you have a big cock, she's probably just pulling your leg.
I tried to dress hot so my boyfriend would cast some attention upon me, but it just made him sweat.
Why are the same Sally jokes told over and over again? Because how can you tell jokes about someone who's dead?
Why did the orphan commit crimes? To know what it's like to be wanted.
Why didn't the movie star argue with the customer service clerk?
He didn't have a good counter act!
Jokes about Marie Antoinette aren't funny, but that's no reason to lose your head.
I like my girlfriend's new secondary school uniform, I guess, but doesn’t beat her old primary school one. 😀
Wife: I think these pants are getting too small for me!
Husband: Don't worry, maybe you are just bad at laundry.
Student: Why does everyone hate me?
Another student: Because U got the A last night.
What’s the best thing about a blowjob?
The ten minutes of silence.
Yo momma is so fat that the ground shakes a lot as she walks.
I told my sister to make a noise and hear what she said... "Cuckoo coo chew." #Owl🦉