Bounty Hunter jokes
What do you call a passport for Mandalorians?
A Pre Visa!
What do you call a homeless bounty hunter?
Hobo Fett!
Why did the bounty hunter not cash in an orphan?
He was not worth keeping.
What did the bounty hunter call his favorite dog?
His Boba Pet.
Three citizens were going through an exam to become agents of the FBI. Their instructor handed the first guy a gun in a room with his wife and said he had to shoot her. He walked out in shame and said he couldn't do it. The second guy had the same scenario. He put the gun up, but couldn't pull the trigger, so he walked out in shame. The third guy was put in the same scenario. He walked out and told the instructor, "The gun wasn't loaded, I had to strangle the bitch."
I've been looking for my ex-girlfriend's killer for the past two years.
But no one would do it.
Two hunters were walking through the forest one day. All of the sudden, one of them passes out. The other hunter panics and dials 911. The emergency responder says, “911, what's your emergency?” The hunter replies, “My friend just passed out and I don’t know what to do! I think he might be dead!” The emergency responder replies, “Before you do anything, make sure he is dead.” The phone goes silent, and then the responder hears a gunshot. The hunter gets back on the phone and says, “Ok, now what?”
Give a man a gun, and he will rob a bank.
Give a man a bank, and he will rob everyone.
I took my mother-in-law out yesterday morning.
Damn, I love being a sniper.