Short jokes

Short jokes

Soviet Russia

A Russian walked into a bar... unlucky for him, in Soviet Russia, you don’t walk into bars. Bars walk into you.

Potato Chip

Q: What do you get when you drop all your potato chips in your couch somewhere?

A: A couch potato. HaHaHa

Woman

When God created women, it was an accident. He meant to make a man, but then "WHOA-MAN!!"

Dog

A policeman just knocked on my door and told me my dogs are chasing people on bikes. That’s ridiculous! My dogs don’t even own bikes!

Poem

Roses are red, violets are blue, this poem doesn’t make sense, washing machine.

Orphan

If you're ever down one day, just go to the orphanage and bully an orphan because what is he going to do about it? He has no parents.

Skeleton

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance party? Because he had NOBODY to dance with.

Graveyard

When you're driving past a graveyard say: "Wow, people were just dying to get in there."

Treasure

So I was digging in the garden and I found some treasure. I was gonna tell my wife when I remembered why I was digging in the garden.

Song

What is Michael Jackson’s favorite song? “Little Drummer Boy.”

Michael Jackson

What’s the difference between Michael Jackson and a pimple? You never see a pimple come on a little boy’s face.

Mum

Your mum sat on a phone, and she turned it into a pancake.

Orange

What does a cop say when you shoot a ginger?

I guess orange is the new black.

Transformation

Michael proved anything is possible in America. Where else can a poor black boy grow up to be a rich white woman?