Short jokes
Knock knock! Who's there? Deja. Deja who? Knock knock!
Why is April the smartest month?
It can never be fooled.
My father is like Houdini. When he heard his girlfriend was pregnant, he disappeared.
Why don't Indians like snow?
Because it's white all over their land.
Hi, I am just wondering who went into my account, 'cause I've changed my password, by the way.
Roses are red,
I don't know what is brass.
I tell myself,
"Don't touch grass."
Those rape alarms give you a headache, don't they?
Do y'all know the saying "Hang in there?" Well, fuck that, because I might as well be hanging myself.
Q: Why was the gay man fired from the sperm bank?
A: He got caught drinking on the job.
What do you call a cut cucumber?
A guy with no legs.
When you're 34, it'll be 420 months before you turn 69 years old.
Hey girl, are you suicide? 'Cause I think of you everyday.
What do you call Dr. Disrespect on top of a building?
Diddler on the Roof.
I don’t understand why Christians are so against body piercings. Didn’t Jesus have four?
Scientists have proven that there are two things in the air that have been known to cause women to get pregnant: their legs.
Why did God build a stairway to heaven?
So all the disabled people will have to go to hell.
I think it’s dumb that people say a woman belongs in the kitchen.
How else is the rest of the house going to get cleaned?
My grandpa is a great hero. He's the one who shot Hitler.
Why do people come on here just to say that we should not be making these jokes? They literally look this shit up just to complain.
I had a cake for my gender reveal party. I cut it, and the inside was yellow...