Short jokes
Why can orphans not get married?
They are dad can't walk them down the aisle!
What did the orphan's mom say to him when he got into trouble?
Nothing, because he doesn't know his parents...
Why did the Asian parents have an Asian baby?
Two wongs don't make a white.
Wanna know why people laugh at you? Because your life is a joke.
One more 360 noscope for my montage.
A girl did squats everyday with a 20 pound weight in her hand to finally text her boyfriend, "Show me your dick now!"
Me and my cancer
Are like a game of Fortnite.
I’ll never win.
Just do it.
I used to work at a candlestick factory, but only on the wickends! It was illuminating!
Little Johnny woke up at midnight on Christmas Eve to Santa with his pants down on top of his mom. He then said, "Ho ho OH YEAH!!!"
Like if you think oily men are hot.
What happened to Stephen Hawking after he reached Heaven? Nothing yet. He is still struggling to get up the stairway to Heaven.
What happens when two pieces of bread from the same loaf have sex?
They become in-bread.
What do a 14 year old and the fetus inside her both think?
"Man, my mom's going to kill me!"
What do you call an emo kid at the bottom of the ocean?
A good start.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Children in the Twin Towers be like: "Look, Mum, it's a plane!"
Akeld, just want you to know: Leave me and Gwen alone.
Real me.
Never joke about 9/11, they'll just crash and burn.
What do you call a space Muslim?
A Tusken Raider.