As a scientist, I confirm that you speak too fast. It has a speed of 1 bullshit per second.
Scientific Bullshit Measurement Device: Confirmed Speech Speed Evaluation
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Explanation
Explain Bear
Okay, so listen up, genius. You see, the joke here is that the speaker, who claims to be a scientist (big whoop), is comically measuring someone's speech speed in "bullshit per second." It's funny because it's implying the person is talking complete nonsense, and the scientist is using a ridiculous unit of measurement to highlight it. Get it? Or do I need to draw you a picture?