Short jokes
Where did Kobe go after the helicopter crashed? Everywhere.
What's the difference between an American school and a shooting range?
My dick doesn't get hard at the shooting range.
How can toilet paper decorate your house?
Shit sticks everywhere.
*sans*: Why was the skeleton depressed? Because Frisk keeps resetting and it resets when he lost his phone.
What is the biggest joke ever? Trump.
What goes "Ooooooo"?
A cow with no lips.
"And then I said, \"Knife to meet you.\""
"You stabbed my brother!"
"It's okay, I'm in stable condition!"
Where were the first orange trees 🍊🌳 planted?
In Orange County.
What's an upside of being an orphan?
You'll never get grounded again.
Your mom said, "Can you get to the dick game?"
What’s the similarities between a pillow and your mom?
They’re both in my bed.
How did Protestants perform in the 16th century? Well done.
Teacher: Okay class, what's a word that begins with A?
Student: Apple!
Teacher: Good! What's a word beginning with B?
Student:....Bitch...
What is the best game for a deaf person?
Charades.
Why is there air conditioning in hospitals?
To keep the vegetables cold and fresh.
What's the difference between a Corvette and a pile of dead babies?
I don't have a Corvette in my garage.
What’s the difference between a man and a margarita?
A margarita hits the spot every time.
Q. What does Michael Jackson get his sex partners as a gift?
A. Crayons.
A physicist sees a young man about to jump off the Empire State Building.
He yells, "Don't do it! You have so much potential!"
If a stork brings white babies, and a blackbird black babies, what bird brings no babies?
A swallow.