Short jokes
Why do orphans hate any milk?
Their dad did not come back for 10 years. Oh, sorry, he got lost in the store! 🤧
What bumps up and down at 100km an hour?
A baby tied to the back of a speeding truck.
If you've been thinking about singing karaoke with a friend, just duet.
The man was dangling by a string!
I was jealous the day he died.
Hi UwU!
You're gay.
Bro, I am straighter than the pole that your mom dances on for me every night.
What’s an emo's favorite singer?
Slash.
Why do I only date orphans?
Because they never have daddy issues.
Why did the cow have for breakfast?
Answer: Muesli.
"People are more honest when they are tired, so I made my nephew do push-ups 50 times when I realized he stole my cookies."
What song did Whitney Houston listen to while doing cocaine?
"Run It!" by Chris Brown.
How do you poop?
How can you tell if your husband is dead?
The sex is the same, but you get to use the remote.
You would think catholic churches would be in favor of condoms: less DNA evidence.
Who thinks that dogs bark to munch?
When it is quiet when you're having sex and you ask your partner to "Do the roar!"
Awesome, amazing game!
"Where are you? I need to throw you out because Mum said to take out the trash."
Why did Stephen Hawking die? ... Because he pressed "shut down" instead of "sleep."
Why did the orange start blushing?
Because it saw the salad dressing!