Short jokes
What happened to the egg after it went on the rollercoaster?
It was scrambled.
I was checking my shoe in my dad's wallet, and he slapped me. What exactly did I do to warrant the slap?
Jeans! (DYM 98)
Why did the cop ask the orphan if he was home alone?
The orphan said because my parents have never come back yet because I have none.
Why do any orphans have sex?
Because they can't call anyone "daddy."
There was a man. He took a right. He took another right. He took a last right. Why did he stop?
Why are Amoebas so bad at math?
Because, when they need to multiply, they divide.
Your dick is like a shotgun, one cock and you're ready to fire.
My wife is so fat. I finally got up the energy to walk around to the other side. I found someone else!
Why can't fat kids change a tire?
They would eat the donut.
Hey Gwen, reply to me and say if everything is alright.
U die from robot bite.
Why can orphans never go to the shops?
'Cause the Talibans will plane dive into them.
My boyfriend dumped me. Guess who came back crawling for his zimmer frame?
What’s the difference between a dad and a boulder?
About 15 stone.
What do you get if you cross Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama? A blonde n1gger cunt.
I told an emo kid that we were going to hang (hangout), but they took it too literal.
What is the difference between an orange and an orphan?
The orphan always gets picked... Oh wait, I meant an orange always gets picked.
What famous book writer for kids loved insects?
Beatrix Potter.
What holds the sun ☀️ up in the sky?
Sunbeams.