What do you call a retreat in war?
A backup plan.
Short Jokes
Why did the cow not want to talk to the other cow? Because they had beef with each other.
What do you call a stalker stalking himself? A narcissist.
1 and 2 fell in love. The 2 said, "You're the only 1 for me!"
All these jokes are pen-ful to read.
What did the two paintings say after a long battle?
Let's call this one a draw.
I love it when candy canes are in mint condition.
Wanted to get the scoop on history of ice cream, so I went to Sunday school.
You watch 50 Shades of Grey, and you turn grey in bed.
I was wondering why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
Life is like giving head... it always sucks.
What would you call the Eiffel Tower if it falls over? The I Fell Tower!
Where does Spider-Man keep his pictures?
On a website.
Why is an iPhone X perfect for an orphan? Because it doesn't have a home button.
What is a pig’s 🐷 favorite pie 🥧?
Mississippi Mud.
What's the difference between a snow woman and snow man?
Snowballs.
How is Stephen Hawking so smart? He uploads it to his software.
Why can't all guys be more like Kenny? He doesn't get all upset when his mom isn't in the mood.
Why do some men call their testicles "bells"? Because it's next to their "ding-dong."
Police arrested a man who dropped his phone in the ocean. The was charged with a salt in battery.
