Short jokes
Kobe ended so many games with threes. Now he ends his life with trees.
What's the best thing about a blowjob?
- The silence.
What is a pig crossed with a pineapple?
A porkypine!
How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's a silly question. Feminists can't change anything.
What's the difference between $1 million and baby teeth?
I don't have $1 million in my wallet.
Where did Janet go during the bombing? Everywhere.
I didn't like having long nails, but they're growing on me.
You're probably getting tired of these gravity jokes... but I keep falling for them every time.
A man walks into a bar with a slab of concrete under his arm and says, "A beer please! and one for the road!"
What's a skeleton's favorite food?
Spare ribs.
What do apples and witches have in common? They both hang on trees.
My 2 year old Asian baby cant do calculus Look who in sweatshop now
What do an ice cream cone and a Ukrainian orphanage have in common?
Children scream when they melt.
I was both shocked and amazed to hear Stephen Hawking kicked the bucket.
What was the last thought Jesus had before he died?
"Man, I could really use a crowbar right about now."
I'm a rapist.
How did Helen Keller lose her virginity?
I told her the plunger was stuck in the toilet, but she didn’t listen...
Your forehead is so big, Mastermind got jealous.
What's the difference between Stephen and a car? A car loses oil, Stephen loses the ability to walk.
I'll never forget my grandfather's last words: "STOP SHAKING THE LADDER, YOU LITTLE CUNT!"