Short jokes
I like George Floyd's new song. It is really breathtaking.
What do the Titanic and the Sixth Sense have in common?
Icy dead people.
What do maths and 9/11 have in common?
They both prove two parallel lines can be intercepted by a plane.
Why does JD Vance not need a conviction?
His running mate has 34 of them!
How do you make a builder cry?
Kill his family.
If her age is on the clock, she gets the cock.
Why is the B so cool? Because it’s in between A and C.
My girlfriend left me because of my obsession with pasta. -- I'm doing well, but I do get cannelloni.
A wise man once told me: "If you poke the bear in prison, the bear will happily return the favor when it's time to shower."
How many orphans does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they don't even got a home.
Twinkle, twinkle little star. I hope I'll get hit by a car. I am not dead yet, I hope I'll die. I hope I'll be born to a new whole life.
What is the difference between Betty White and Paul Walker?
Betty didn’t reach 100 before she died.
The doctor gave me one year to live, so I shot him with my gun. The judge gave me 15 years. Problem solved.
Bad Hitler puns are infuhrerating.
What's Pee-Wee Herman's favorite Michael Jackson song?
Beat It.
If I'm ugly, at least I'm not you.
What do you call a skunk falling from the sky?
A stink bomb!
What do you call a broken pencil? Never mind, it's pointless!
How do you know a hippie is on her period?
Her socks are missing.
How do you know she's off?
Her socks are tye-dye.
I found Nemo.
He was tasty.