Short jokes
What did the feather say to his wife?
You light my day.
What do you call an imposter octopus?
Octosus.
It's a very smart day today. I'd say it has about 30-45 degrees, with humidex.
Have you met Bofa?
Bofa deez blind kids!
My grandfather is a great fisherman, especially at baiting a rod.
I guess you could call him the Master Baiter.
Yo, stop making 9/11 jokes. My grandpa was a pilot.
What is the worst part about making an Asian girl squirt?
She charges you for extra sauce!
What's the difference between a cheater and your mom?
They both cheated!
What do you call a blond with half a brain? Gifted.
Your Mom is so friking fat, that when she ripped her pants and went to the seamster, they said, "We don't sew curtains!"
You're so fat that when you got to McDonald's, they had to call Wendy's for backup.
9/11 was pretty great to me, it's just hilarious to watch people lose at Jenga.
What do you call the day before Christmas Eve? Christmas Adam.
I’m going to be scared of diesel.
What is the similarity between depressed people and hoodies?
The color black.
Do you know Warrior Cats?
I heard Hawkfrost is cold.
My friend fell on the Nile river and Egypt last week.
He swears by it, but he’s in denial.
What’s the difference between a Ferrari and a sack of dead babies? I don’t have a Ferrari in my garage.
Helen Keller def faked it.
If I found BlessedBrian's jokes FUNNY, I would be just as retarded as HIM.