Short jokes
A hamburger walks into a bar.
The bartender says, "I'm sorry. We don't serve food here."
I can’t believe it’s been over a year since Kobe decided he’s too good to wait in traffic.
How did Reese eat her cereal? - Witherspoon!
What's the difference between a cranky two-year-old and a duckling? One is a whiny toddler, and the other is a tiny waddler.
When two wheelchairs hit each other, is it a fender bender?
Why can't dinosaurs clap?
Because they're dead.
What is sprinkled around the Pokémon floor? Oh right. Ash's ashes.
This is so sad, Alexa, play Despacito.
This page could use more "butt quack" jokes.
People joke about 9/11, but it's not funny. My dad died in 9/11. Best pilot in Saudi Arabia.
Astronauts just found water on Mars! Mars: 1. Africa: 0.
Why don't Chinese kids celebrate Christmas?
Because they make the toys.
The more people who like to eat Tide Pods, the less idiots we have in the world. 😁
What do a coin and an Irish man have in common?
They're both fun to flip off.
What do my clothes and a depressed person not have in common?
My clothes don't hang themselves...
Why did Helen Keller ride a broken roller coaster?
She didn't see anything wrong with it.
Why did the bald man paint rabbits on his head?
Because from a distance, they looked like hare.
What do you call 2 Indians on a dating website? Connect the dots.
What do you call a plane with no wings? Sally.
Why do ballerinas wear tutus?
The one-ones are too small and the three-threes are too big.