Short jokes
Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building? Of course. The Empire State Building can't jump.
Pickup line; Hey mama, you school? Cuz I'd like to shoot some kids up in you.
I nailed my Jewish girlfriend so hard, she turned Christian.
Teachers at a school shooting be like: damn it. That's the third one this week and it's only Monday.
Why did God make men?
Because you can't teach a vibrator how to mow the lawn...
Why are fish easy to measure?
Because they bring their own scales.
Never attempt to foreshadow your own death, you may end up regretting it. You can chop me up and throw me in the fridge if I’m wrong.
Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? - In case he got a hole in one.
My conversion therapy done worked. Now I only sleep with my sister and not my brother.
A good dog name is Syndrome. That way when it tries attacking, you can yell, "Down, Syndrome!"
Real quick, I'm autistic, and if anyone asks, I absolutely love some of these jokes. XD I found this while doing some research for a paper.
It's only rape.
If she finds out.
Humanity.
I would name my daughter Awesome so I can tell people that I'm fucking awesome.
What’s the difference between people and chocolate? I can still buy dark chocolate.
What do you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?
Stop and apply lubrication.
What did the little boy say to the fat man?
How many Japs did you get?
If Italy attacked France from the rear, would Greece help?
Surely people would consider putting pedals on wheelchairs so that their arms don't get tired.
Why do Indians have a red dot on their head?
Because they're recording.