Short jokes

Short jokes

Friend

I was talking to my friends and they said a random topic about cats, and I'm like, "Water you talking about?" =3

Dad

"Wanna hear a joke?"

"Sure."

"You SURE will be glad when this dad joke's over."

"That was pretty DAD!"

Apple

What do you say when you see an apple dancing in a talent show?

He's got some "sweet" moves!

Year

What's the best thing about f***ing twenty-six year olds?

There's twenty of them.

Sister

When you're excited to finally see your sister, and then you realize she's wearing your clothes.

Skeleton

A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a drink and a mop.

“Huh, I wonder why he needs a mop?”

Order

McDonald's worker: Order, order!

Customer: I didn't do anything wrong!

Shower

What do you call your mom when she goes into the shower?

A shower ma! (shawarma)

Bill

One day me and my friend Howard the duck went into the bar. I ordered a drink. Howard told the waiter to put it on his... BILL.

Movie

#1: What are you doing?

#2: Watching a movie.

#1: Oh, I know why, because you move-ie.

Face

It looks like your face was lit on fire and someone tried to extinguish it with a hammer!

Fish

Why are Bengalis so fishy?

Because the fish ate them on a daily basis.