What's a depressed kid's favorite holiday?.... Christmas because everything is hanging.
Short Jokes
Why are there only 363 days in an orphan's calendar? They don't have Father's or Mother's Day.
I'd rate the food in Afghanistan a 9/11. That shit was bomb.
Me: Have you ever went sky diving?
Friend: No.
Me: Well don't, it sucks.
Friend: Why?
Me: They gave me a parachute and I lived.
What's the difference between puppies and orphans?
The puppies actually get adopted.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed? Tell him to clap until his parents come home.
What does PEMDAS stand for?
Please End My Depression And Suffering.
One day, I saw a kid sitting on the curb dressed in rags. I asked if he was an orphan. He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?" I said, "His parents."
You wanna hear a suicide joke? Nvm, it didn't make it.
What do you call an orphan's family tree? A stump.
What does a cannibal call a pregnant person?
A Kinder Surprise.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 Victims, they went through 89 stories in 7 seconds.
September 11, bring your plane to work day.
Why do orphans like getting kidnapped? Because someone actually wants them. 🤣
Me: Mom, I'm tired.
Mom: "Then go to sleep."
Me: No, you don't understand-
If an illegal immigrant fights against a child molester, would that be "Alien vs Predator"?
If I went to Walmart, I would be able to scan my own wrists because they're barcodes too.
What’s New York’s favorite game?
2001 flight simulator.
If you die a virgin, then where does your v-card go? Does it go with you to the grave, or does your mortician take it from you?
What's a pedophile's favorite type of garden?
A kindergarden.
