Short jokes
Yo Nan.
Why can't Chinese play baseball?
Because they eat the bats.
What do you take care of after a car crash?
The witnesses.
What kind of star will come out in the daytime?
A starfish! 🐟🐠🐡🦐🦞🦀🦑🐙🦂
What do you call a lanky yellow man with abnormally large ears? Zac! Hahahahahahahahahahah
Why are tomatoes 🍅 the slowest vegetable?
Because they can’t ketchup.
My hotel tried to charge me ten dollars extra for air conditioning. That wasn’t cool.
What do you get when you cross the Atlantic with the Titanic? About half way.
If you don't stop with the puns, soon it won't be so fun.
There's a new cooking programme on BBC1. The contestants are victims of domestic violence. It's called "Can't Cook... Right Hook."
If drinking alcohol makes you an alcoholic, does drinking Fanta make you fantastic?
At my funeral, take the bouquet off the coffin and throw it into the crowd to see who's next.
When I die, can someone play "Best Day Ever" during my funeral?
What were Steven Hawking's last words?
Error 404 File Not Found.
What is more fun than spinning a clown around on a clothes line at 100 miles an hour?
Stopping it with a pitchfork.
Why did the scientist want to take off his doorbell?
Because he wanted to win the no-bell prize.
What kind of dogs do miners like best?
Golden retrievers, haha, get it?
Never break someone’s heart, they only have one.
Break their bones instead, they have 206 of them.
What do fish take to stay healthy?
Vitamin Sea.
Children should never run with scissors, and lesbians should never scissor with the runs.