Short jokes
I fell into a water bed with super soil. Next thing I'm in a flower bed.
What's green and smells like pork?
Kermit's fingers!
My country is so corrupt that it voted me as the most sexiest man.
Victory assured, I will continue like that till I'm six feet under.
Where do spiders seek health advice? WebMD.
Your hairline looks like the stairway to hell.
Bent and far back.
What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino?
El, if I know.
I asked my phone why I couldn't get a date.
It showed a picture of myself.
Your mum... payed other people to take you!!!!
I ain't f***ing with you, there's 1 million things I'd rather f***ing do.
So, if there is a 7-Eleven and a 911, where's 811?
What is a pirate's favorite ride? A carrr!
You wonder where my dad is.
Meanwhile, Dad: It's good to be at milk island!
Why can't my grandma talk?
Because she's dead.
I feel wrong. What does this make us?
Still cousins.
What do you call a horde of Autistic kids?
A zombie Apocalypse!
Uuuuuuhhhhhhhhh🧟
I remember you. You used to be an ash.
I would love to roast you more, but my mom said to not burn trash.
Mike Oxlong: What's deez, Mike?
Mike Oxsmall: I dunno. What is deez?
Mike Oxlong: DEEZ NUTS! HA, GOT 'EM!
What do you call a tire that is tired?
A tire, I guess. ❤️
What happens when you hit Dwayne Johnson's butt? You hit rock bottom.
What do you call an Indian eating cows? Mooove to jail.