Short jokes
When Kenney goes down on his mom, does he taste vegetable or fish?
My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer. I'm not too worried, I think she's joking.
Smile, because it confuses people. Smile, because it’s easier than explaining what is killing you inside.
Any game: "Are you a boy or a girl?"
Non-binary people: *cries*
Dad: School is canceled, I think your teacher died or something.
Me: Wow, they found the body already?
Dad: :/
Why are Egyptian gods orphans?
Because Egypt needs to sell Anubis (a new bus) every year to make a prophet.
The orphan started crying at school when he got suspended and had to go home.
I'm not saying you're inbred. I'm just saying you're a textbook example of why consanguineous marriage might not be the best idea.
What's the difference between an escaped prisoner and an orphan?
Only one is wanted.
Teacher: If you keep talking over me, I'll call your parents!
Orphan: You will?
Why did the astronaut return to Earth?
She went on her launch break! 🚀🥪😋
Why does Santa have three gardens?
So he can Hoe Hoe Hoe!
Everybody misses Xxxtentacion, but the bullet didn't...
Donkeys are cool.
What cow can part water? Mooses.
Sleep, but make it forever.
A scarecrow got promoted because he was outstanding in his field.
Why did the lemon 🍋 go to the doctor 👩⚕️?
Because he had a sour stomach.
I am right 95 percent of the time, who cares about that other 5 percent?
I will always remember my grandfather's last words: "I'll just check if it's poisonous."