Short jokes
Why do orphans love violent video games like GTA?
They never had parents to protect them from it.
Why is "T" well-respected, but more in its lowercase form?
It crossed the line with Jesus.
What constellation has no hair at all?
Cancer.
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Nut
You know what would be the best last thing to say before you die? "No, you certainly can't." JFK's assassin certainly can!
My name is Myria, my right nut.
A teacher walked up to me and said, "How did we get butt cracks?"
I was like 4, so I said, "You had an earthquake on your booty."
Bootylicious lol
Roses are red, violets are blue, Old man Jeffrey touches the youth.
Don't you find it ironic that Kobe Bryant bounced his helicopter off the ground like a basketball?
Why does Africa have no pharmacies? Because you can't have medicine on an empty stomach.
What has two legs, two arms, one dead and covered in red?
My ex-wife.
Why didn't R. Kelly go to Germany to fuck teens? The legal age there is 14...Like bro hop on a plane and fuck a 14 year old hooker!
Simpsons.
Meet the Simpsons.
They're the greatest modern family.
From the town of Springfield.
They're a page right out of history.
Heyyy, in the last six months, [I had] 4 suicide attempts, broke up with 3 girls, and my mom went on drugs.
What is the difference between Madeleine McCann and a submarine?
They are both full of seamen and are at the bottom of the ocean.
How do Chinese parents name their children?
Dropping a pan down the stairs. Bing, Bong, Dong.
What's the difference between a watermelon and an orphan?
One you cut into 2 with a knife.
And the watermelon you cut into pieces.
When your cousin who has a lisp died from the impostor in Among Us,
"THE IMPASTA KILLED MEH!"
Why did Tigger look in the toilet?
He was looking for "poo."
Why can't pirates play cards in the jungle?
Too many cheetahs.