Short jokes

Short jokes

Mum

Ur mum smells like shit, yeah, so she sucks a man off and washing machine. Yo, don’t at me, yeah, you chicken breath.

Bet

"1v1," said Kobe. LeBron James says, "Ok, bet," and bet the money. Bro, ok, let's get it."

Food

I ask my sister why the Chinese owner brings us free food all the time.

My sister said to me "I love him long time."

Lamb

Mary had a little lamb.

Key word is had, her dad's favorite meat is a human!

Nun

At night in the Nunnery, one Nun says to the other Nun, "Where's the candle?" The other Nun says, "Doesn't it!"

Hand

I can't handle these puns...

But I can HAND you some puns!

Budum tiss!

Body

"Why can’t you be comfortable with my own body?"

"I think you should ask yourself that."

Hipster

How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

It's some weird number. You probably never heard of it.

Word

A kindergarten teacher asks her students, "Do you know any words that start with P?"

Little Timmy responds with, "Elmo."