Short jokes
Chemistry joke: Why did the Superman being normal people when a krypton was at him?
Because krypton is "stable."
My Dad keeps beating me and my mom. Please call the police. My name is Jacob Upchurch.
Dad: Uh, yeah!
Son: Mom, Dad, what are you doing!
Parents: Sex!
Son: What?
Parents: Look, you can spectate!
What's the difference between a grape and an elephant?
I don't know, what?
They are both purple except for the elephant.
You know the song "Getting Drunk on a Plane"? It was written by the pilot of the Lingard Skinner pilot.
What’s the best math equation to eat?
Cosine Law.
What do you get when you cross a Muslim in a trench coat and a duffel bag?
A sad news story.
If cops are called pigs, then security guards are piglets.
What did the ankle say to the doorman?
You are a nonsense.
Yo mama so fat, that when she gets in a monster truck, it becomes a low-rider!
My dick is like the way home for an orphan, its length is never-ending.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Madam.
Madam who?
Madam foot got caught in the door, can you please open it!
Why is sex with pandas so much fun?
I don't know, it just is. 🐼
John: What's 9+10?
Jake: 21
I lost all faith in humanity. I am moving to Uranus; it's really big. I might get lost.
My dad was on a hotdog with ketchup.
Eed?
All of the jokes are just abuse.
Stephen Hawking is as broke as his legs.
What do you call two bears jerking each other off?
Bipolar.