Read this:
Crack
What did you think of? A window crack or the drug?
Short Jokes
All of the jokes are just abuse.
Which came first, the chicken or the egg?
Eggs don’t cum.
My wife told me to give her 8 inches, so I had to have sex with her 4 times and punch her in the nose.
I'm running out of degrees? I guess I better throw myself in fire to raise my internal temperature (measured in degrees).
What do you call Mary Berry when she’s on holiday?
A Cake By The Ocean.
What did the knight say when he went to bed?
"Good Knight!" lul
Your momma is so fat, the whole Earth falls down to 100,000,000 ft.
My dad was on a hotdog with ketchup.
We are drunk at the party. There was an ass-ton of drunk girls there with me.
Eed?
When she says she wrestles, so you pull out your dick and she punches it.
How do you quiet a baby down?
Make baby back ribs for dinner.
How do you saw an apple with no mouth?
A P P L E
Why was the sea so friendly? Because it gave a little wave.
Kevin McClean
He couldn't take the stairway to heaven; he had to take the lift.
Stephen Hawking tried to crack Abutu.
Why is Hugh's mum so fucking fat?
Because she ate the 34 other kids she had but now only has 6,789.
What’s one thing smarter than Stephen Hawking? His computer.