Short jokes
I almost had a joke about Parkinson's disease, but I was too shaken up to say it.
Why do people keep on making jokes about the twin towers?
Because they go down so well.
I got the newest Call of Duty game! I got a 200 kill streak, then I went home and played COD.
I was gonna tell a self harm joke, but realized it would cause too much pain.
Did you hear about the exciting new drug they developed for lesbians with depression? They call it: TRICOXAGIN.
You: "Captain, where is this plane going?"
Captain: "New York, 175 Greenwich Street."
Did you know Cobain had dandruff? Yep. They found his head and shoulders all over the back of his couch.
I have depression, and am suicidal. Nobody knows though, let's joke about that lol.
If you want to see my foes, bring a shovel and bring a map and a getaway car just in case we get caught.
What did the pillow say as it fell off the bed?
Oh sheet!
What is purple and whines when it’s squished?
A bunch of grapes! 🍇😂
When earthquakes hit, coffins become maracas underground.
Why is reverse cowgirl banned in Alabama? Because you should never turn your back on family.
In communist Russia there is no discrimination. White, black, African, American, British and Asian. They all go to Gulag eventually.
A guy finds a genie.
He says, "I wish I was better at talking to women."
"Poof!" the genie says, "You're gay!"
What’s an abbreviation for school in America?
Shooting range.
Jokes just as dead as the victims.
Why is a white guy in prison scarier than a black guy in prison?
The white guy actually did it.
What animal should wear a wig?
A bald eagle!
Why do you call a man that is physically handicapped and German?
A physically handicapped bisexual man that is promiscuous and German.
What do you call an Indian gymnast? Balance Singh.