Short jokes
Runescape is the only form of birth control that is 100% effective.
If you have 20 apples and you ate 2, how many do you have left?
0 because you have 20 and take away 2, you have 0 left.
What's the name for a short legged tramp?
A low-down bum.
Did you hear about the mad who got his whole left side cut off? He's all right now.
Roses are red, My friend is choking. That stupid bitch shouldn't have eaten my muffin.
What's the difference between the microphone and Bambi?
One is a Welsh idea, the other's a well shy deer.
Max Alexander Heart is adopted.
Evan David Sandri is gay and he is adopted.
"Hi, my name is Robert. I have no life. Even my PS4 username is gay lil_bama."
What did Harry Houdini say when he did his famous vanishing act at a sushi place?
"Now sashimi, now you don't!"
What did a comedian say at a show full of blind people?
"What's up?"
Take it in the ear day? More like take it in the rear day.
God better hope they got an elevator to Heaven.
What do an acting role and playing sports have in common?
If you break a leg, you get cast.
Why did the camel cross the road?
Because it wanted to get to the bright green grass.
Why does the sun get a lot of girls? Because it's hot.
What do you call a bear with no ears? A b.
Yeah, that joke was unbearable.
What did the boyfriend say to his girlfriend?
Two pencils walking down the street.
Which one hasn’t got AIDS?
The one with the rubber on.
Balalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala!